Polygamy Is A Lot Harder Than It Looks

Girls are soft and they smell good. Every man wants to spend his time with someone who's soft and smells good; it's in our nature. We spend most of our time with other sweaty dudes, grunting and swearing at whatever happens to be at hand. For the most part, women would rather not have anything to do with us, but we keep finding ways to trick them into thinking we're alright.

Some men go out to night clubs to try to pick up women, but woman have better things to do, so the clubs are just filled with funny-smelling dudes looking for nonexistent women. Others try online dating for that soulless, digital feel. I find that putting on pants and shaving most of my face attracts a lot of female attention. Not necessarily good attention, but you get the picture.

Attempting to have a girlfriend requires quite a bit of work. This kid has three -- good luck, dude.

[A big thank you to Charles Schneider for sending this one our way]