The BSBFB Writer Olympics

Welcome to the BSBFB world headquarters. As you can see, our writers are hard at work practicing for the first ever BSBFB writer Olympics. We're bringing in some brand new events that will really knock your socks off.

Our first event is the quadriplegic pummel. How many hits can the contestant land on a disembodied head and torso before he inevitably falls down and hurts himself. It's a lot harder than you'd think; my current record is three.

Our second event is the needless explosion challenge. Even though no explosion is needless we find it necessary to test the boundaries of explosive necessity. The first contestant to make an otherwise inert object explode wins. Last week I made an ice cream truck explode with my pure, unadulterated, awesomeness. I think I've got this one in the bag.

We have about 150 other events but none of them matter, because we only have enough funding for the first two. Maybe next year we won't blow our entire budget on ice cold Zima and pay-per-view.