Hey, Did You Hear About The Finnish Extrovert?

A Finnish extrovert looks at your shoes when he talks to you.


(Thanks to Joan of Argghh for sending that one along)

Pshaw. Pretty Much Every Snowmobiler Does This At Some Point. Just Not On Purpose

Bungee Cord Ax Massacre

Psychobilly Freakout Shriner's Parade

Those fellows should really be wearing fezzes. The situation demands a fez. I demand fezzes next time. Hie thee to Fezzes R Us immediately, sirs. It's next to the liquor store, so it's not out of your way.

(Thanks to the king of the psychobillies, Vanderleun, for sending that one along)

Why Every Railing In Snow Country Feels Waxy

Janne Lipsanen

The German Motorcycle Police Are Well-Prepared For Circus Crime

Amazing How Brave You Can Be On A Borrowed Motorcycle

You'd never ride your own motorcycle up there. Something bad could happen to it. Much safer to borrow one.


(Thanks to the irrepressible Vanderleun for sending that one along)

Are You Man Enough For The Morning Commute In Chechnya?

What ever happened to just flashing your high beams and swearing? Kids these days -- sheesh.

I Wouldn't Surf That With A Battleship For A Board

Chris Bryan films

My Heart's Beeping. That's Good, Right?

A proper borderline sociopathic dad shows his kids all he knows. Generally doesn't take long.

I Wanted To Be A Waterskiier, But I Could Never Find A Lake On A Hill

The Ghost of Peachy Carnehan approves. Paddys in the paddies. It's a natural.

Hmm. "Irish bull surfers." Pshaw. I believe they call it "blarney" back in the auld sod.


(Thanks to Misterarthur for sending that one along)

Little Known Fact: I Made One Of These Once

Unfortunately, I was only trying to plumb a sink trap under a vanity, and it just turned out that way. It sounded great if you left the water running while you brushed your teeth, though.


(Thanks to the BSBFB devotees at Grim's Hall  for sending that one along)

Sonny Bono Unavailable For Comment

Driftin' And Driftin'

I've driven like that quite a bit myself, but never intentionally.

Sometimes You Let Go Because A Swim Is Nicer

(Thanks to Charles Schneider, who's hanging on by his fingernails just like the rest of us, for sending that one along)

Snowbored? Snowboard

Xavier De Le Rue

Yo, Dawg, I Herd You Like Gunz So I Shot My Gun With A Gun So U Could Shoot While U Shoot

I don't often offer advice on the BSBFB, but we highly recommend that you don't put your Glock into your barrel stove if there's any rounds in the clip or the chamber. Just FYI. You know, a suggestion. Nothing hard and fast. Just seems safer.


(Thanks to Vanderleun for sending that along from his fully armed and operational battle station in Seattle)

I Know First-Hand That If You Sing This Song Four Times In A Row, Your Mother Will Give You Anything To Stop

Does your boomerang come back?

Clyde Crashcup Turns The Page

Hipster? I watched Clyde Crashcup make Rube Goldberg machines before he went mainstream. I don't even have a TV anymore.





(Thanks to Charles Schneider for sending that one along)

KraftMaidWerk

Fifteen Minutes. Goes By Fast

(As seen at Dean's Garage)

Real Sociopathic Men Of Genius, Chapter 123: Here's To You, Mr. Ketchupbot With Sketchy Flageolet Accompaniment

It's less messy than an eight-year-old, I'll tell you that.

Your Mother Was A Hamster Submariner And Your Father Smelt Of Elderberries

In the cage where I was born
Lived a rat who went to sea
And he told us of his life
In the land of submarines

So we went out to the pool
Where we found a sea chlorine
And we lived beneath the waves
In our hamster submarine

We all live in a hamster submarine
Hamster submarine,hamster submarine
We all live in a hamster submarine
Hamster submarine,hamster submarine


In the interest of accuracy, that's not a submarine. It's a submersible, or perhaps a diving bell. A submarine is an autonomous vehicle, not tethered with an airline like this thing, and in the navy where the real subs are, they would never waste something as valuable as a hamster in one, preferring instead to fill them with sailors like my childhood friend Tom K. AKA "Fish."

(Thanks to the Ancient Rhyming Mariner at American Digest for sending that one along)

Everybody Was Kung Fu Fighting

This Goat Owner Bears Watching

Upon further reflection, the goat may very well own him.


(Sent in by that Billy-Goat-Gruff-type writer from the wrong coast, Vanderleun)

But There's No Snow. Doesn't That Make It The Longest Tiny Unarmored Half-Track Personnel Carrier Jump?

It's Going To Be Fun Trick-Or-Treating At This Guy's House If He Gets Alzheimer's

The Borderline Sociopathic Boy Is A Born Leader

Old chrome dome had no choice but to fall in line.

Next Time, Try Holding The Grenade And Throwing The Pin. You Can't Do Much Worse

I suppose the drill instructor is not in the panic business, so maybe his lack of panic shouldn't seem so notable. But it does. To paraphrase Rudyard Kipling: If you can keep your head when all about you are trying to blow it off with a misthrown grenade, yours is the Earth and everything that's in it, and - which is more - you'll be a man, my son!

(Thanks to that Borderline cross between Matisse and Audie Murphy, Casey Klahn, for sending that one along)